Deep Breath

Well, I know I wrote last night that I wasn't sure that I wanted to stay out here after October. I have had a change of heart. I am not sure what relit the passion inside me today... Maybe it was talking to Kenton about keeper jobs or maybe it was Dawn talking about wanting to stay out here, or maybe it was realizing that I only have two more months with the monkeys, but I am suddenly determined to get a full time position at the zoo. There are currently 3 keeper positions open at the zoo. I have been looking at applying for one of them for a few months now, but keep hesitating. At first I thought that it was the wrong thing for me right now because I wanted to travel, didn't want to be tied down. But the more I think about it, the more I realize that I can accomplish more within the framework of an organization like the National Zoo then I can on my own. I love the zoo world. I love the people and the animals, the publics enthusiasm and the quirky eccentricities. I love knowing that I am taking the best care possible of an animal. I can help make their lives just a little better while at the same time participating in an education and research program that is helping world wide conservation! I would be immeasurably proud to be a part of such a wonderful thing. I am terribly nervous though. I want this so badly, I am so focused on it now, that I will be very disappointed if I do not get it. I know I would make a damn good keeper. I have the experience and the knowledge, the drive and the passion. I just need to concentrate on making sure they know it too. I am so nervous as I write my application that I am shaking. I haven't wanted anything this intensely in a long time. This is where I find out if all my hard work has been enough. *deep breath* Here goes...