Love and Loneliness

I think I pissed off my little sister. I do not mean to yell or be grouchy or nitpick... It's just that sometimes, something has to be said! Lil sis, since I know you read this from time to time... I am sorry that I am difficult to get along with lately. It is hard to remind myself that my actions, and my words, affect those around me differently then I mean them to at times. You are growing up into such a wonderful young woman and I only want to see you succeed. I see you making mistakes I have made and am trying to hold myself back from telling you what to do. I know you need to learn through your own experiences. Though I miss the days when you used to ask me for advice. And as for tonight, I just don't understand how someone as smart as you could support the improper care and display of an endangered species. I know you don't think of it in the same way I do and your passions lay in different areas but it hurt that you disregarded my previously expressed concern. It just leaves me little hope that I can ever change society when my words do not even have an influence on my sister's choices... Sometimes it all just seems worthless... Anyhow, I love you and as much as you may hate it, you will always be my little sister and we will probably always annoy each other. I just need you to know it is only because I love you...

Being single has taught me more and more to appreciate the people who are around me on a regular basis. Boyfriends come and go but family will always be there. And there is nothing in the world that I would trade for my family. Even when that family is constantly a reminder of what I am missing in the romance department. It is hard to be civil around my siblings and their significant others because, well, half of me doesn't approve of them in some ways and the other half of me just longs for that type of relationship again. I can deal with it when I am not around the reminders but once that memory triggers I have trouble controlling my moods... I am trying though for the sake of both my family and my friends, and myself for that matter. Luckily I know I am strong enough to make it single, I just hope my family is strong enough to deal with me dealing with it. ;)

Huggles